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The Rookie Report: Week 8 Starts & Sits
(Note: All fantasy point totals and rankings are based on half-PPR scoring unless otherwise noted. All players under same header at same position are listed in order I would play them this week.)
Rookies to Start:QB Joe Burrow, CIN (Wk. 8: vs. Ten.): Joe Burrow has had the Browns’ number this season in spite of the Bengals’ 0-2 record against Cleveland this year. Over the two games Burrow totaled over 700 yards and 6 scores through the air, and another 53 and a TD on the ground. Since week 2, Burrow has thrown for over 300 yards against every opponent he’s faced except the Ravens, and the Titans aren’t a daunting matchup. Tennessee has given up the 10th-most QB points per game despite facing the 11th-easiest QB schedule. They’ve allowed each of the last 5 QBs they’ve faced to throw for 250+ yards and multiple TDs, and I’d expect the Bengals’ QB to have a great chance to extend that streak to 6. Burrow is in play for 1-QB leagues this week.
QB Justin Herbert, LAC (Wk. 8:@DEN): Herbert is coming off a monster game in week 7, his best fantasy game of the year, but the matchup this week isn’t quite as easy. I’d still view him as a low-end QB1 for week 8. He’s thrown for at least 260 yards each game this season and has accounted for 11 total TDs in the last 3 weeks. Denver has only allowed 2 QBs to throw for 250 yards against them, and has given up just 1 passing TD total in the last 3 games, but they’ve proven to be vulnerable to QB runs. Sam Darnold ran for 84 yards and a score against them in week 4, and Cam Newton ran for 76 and a TD in week 6. Herbert showed what he can do running the ball last week with 66 yards and a TD on the ground. That rushing ability should give him enough cushion to withstand it if he doesn’t have a ceiling passing game. View Herbert as a very strong QB2 or upside low-end QB1.
RB Jonathan Taylor, IND (Wk. 8:@DET): Taylor benefitted in his last couple games from a banged up Jordan Wilkins, and while Wilkins may be healthier this week the matchup with Detroit is good enough for Taylor to be a locked-in RB2 even if he cedes some carries to Wilkins. Detroit allows the 5th-most RB points per game, the Colts are favored by a field goal, and Taylor is coming off his most productive receiving game since week 1. Taylor is a safe bet to make a run at 100 scrimmage yards for the second game in a row, and given the Colts’ implied total of 26.5 he’s a pretty good bet to find the end zone as well.
RB Clyde Edwards-Helaire, KC (Wk. 8: vs. NYJ): I can’t say for sure if Edwards-Helaire has felt the pressure from the Chiefs’ signing of Le’Veon Bell, but his play over the last two weeks has looked like that of a man that doesn’t want to lose his job. In Bell’s debut, CEH had to split work with the veteran addition, and had to give way to DeAndre Washington in the 2nd half with the game well in hand, but he still managed to finish as the RB15 for the week. This week’s matchup with the Jets has as lopsided of an NFL betting line as I’ve ever seen, with Kansas City favored by an absurd 19.5 points. It’s possible CEH and Bell are watching from the sideline down the stretch again, but you can’t sit Clyde in this game. The Jets have allowed the 8th-most RB points per game, and CEH is the lead half of the RB committee in a game where the Chiefs implied total is 34 points. There is a great chance that Edwards-Helaire gets in the end zone in this one, and he should be locked into your lineup if you have him.
WR Justin Jefferson, MIN (Wk. 8:@GB): Over the last month or so Jefferson has made a clear case that his upside is just too much to leave on your bench. He’s topped 100 yards in 3 of his last 4 games, and 160 in two of them. He did square off with the Packers in week 1 without much success (2-26 on 3 targets), but that was with no preseason, and he had yet to unseat Bisi Johnson for the WR2 role. Adam Thielen is likely to draw shadow coverage from Jaire Alexander, which could be a boost for Jefferson. Alexander has struggled with Adam Thielen in past meetings, including coughing up 6-110-2 on 8 targets in week 1, but Jaire has been much better since then. The Vikings are a 6-point underdog, so game script should keep them throwing. Jefferson should be a solid WR2 this week.
WR Brandon Aiyuk, SF (Wk. 8:@SEA): The 49ers just cannot keep their offensive weapons healthy this season. Last Sunday it was Deebo Samuel and Jeffrey Wilson who went down, and Aiyuk stands to benefit from it this week. The Seahawks have allowed the most WR points per game in the league, and rank 30th in Football Outsiders’ pass defense DVOA stat. He’ll be the default WR1 in this game. The 49ers have a reputation of throwing most of their passes within 5 yards of the line of scrimmage, and Aiyuk can excel in that short passing game, but the average pass thrown to Aiyuk has been over 11 yards downfield. The 49ers will have to score to keep pace with Seattle, and that probably means 7+ targets for the rookie. He’s going to be a safe WR3 in all formats this week.
Borderline Rookies:RB JaMycal Hasty, SF (Wk. 8:@SEA): Pretty soon the 49ers should just start putting the words “next man up” on the back of their running back jerseys rather than a name. They’ve seen Raheem Mostert, Tevin Coleman, and now Jeffrey Wilson all go down with injuries this year, and every time someone goes down, they seem to have a dynamic back ready to step in and take over. It appears to be Hasty’s turn to be that back. He’s looked great on the opportunities he’s gotten in the last two weeks, totaling 94 yards on 18 carries. The Seahawks have been a solid run defense ranking 8th in run defense DVOA and allowing the 12th-fewest points per game to the position, but they struggled to contain Dalvin Cook, Alexander Mattison, and Chase Edmonds in their last 2 games. The absence of run-stuffing safety Jamal Adams has started to be a problem. Adams’ status is still up in the air this week. If he plays it would be a slight downgrade for Hasty, but he should be in line for 15+ carries and a few targets as well. Jerick McKinnon will mix in a bit as well but look for Hasty to be the lead back. He should be a reasonable RB2 option this week depending on what your lineup looks like.
RB D’Andre Swift, DET (Wk. 8: vs. Ind.): Swift managed to find the end zone for the second straight week last Sunday, but the touchdown was the highlight of an otherwise pedestrian fantasy day. There were some positives to take away though. It was the second straight week where Swift led the backfield in snaps, and he’s also seen almost as many carries as Adrian Peterson in those two weeks. He’s also now seen 4+ targets in 5 of 6 games for the season. He gets a tough matchup this week with the Colts, who allow the 5th-fewest running back points per game, so you should temper expectations a little bit. I still think Swift has shown enough that he will continue to see the most snaps and touches in this backfield and is a viable flex option this week even in a difficult matchup.
RB Zack Moss, BUF (Wk. 8: vs. NE): Moss played in almost an even split of the backfield snaps with Devin Singletary in week 7, and if that timeshare continues he could be a sneaky upside option in week 8. The Patriots can be run on. They rank just 25th in run defense DVOA and have allowed at least 1 running back in each of their last 5 games to reach 60+ rushing yards and 80+ scrimmage yards. Buffalo is a 3.5-point favorite in this game, so game script should remain at least neutral for them. I like Moss’s chances of getting 10+ carries and, I think he’s the more likely bet than Singletary if the Pats are going to extend their streak to 6 games of 60+ and 80+. I view him as an upside RB3/flex option.
RB JK Dobbins, BAL (Wk. 8: vs. Pit.): Mark Ingram left the Ravens’ week 6 game with an injury heading into the bye week, and he’s still not practicing this week as of Thursday. That means Dobbins and Gus Edwards are likely to split the backfield work on Sunday. The two saw an almost dead-even split of the snaps in week 6, with Dobbins handling 9 carries and 4 targets while Edwards handled 14 and 1. Dobbins had more rushing yards on his 9 attempts than Edwards had on 14. This week’s matchup with Pittsburgh is a difficult one. The Steelers rank 1st in run defense DVOA and have allowed the 2nd-fewest points to the position, so it could be a bit of an uphill fight to a strong fantasy day. If you had to choose one of the two to play this week, I would go with Dobbins. He’s clearly the more explosive back, and he’s posted 3 plays of 30+ yards on just 36 touches this season. I’d view him as a contrarian DFS play at $4,600 in DraftKings and a flex option in deeper leagues.
RB Joshua Kelley, LAC (Wk. 8:@DEN): Kelley seemed to move ahead of Justin Jackson in the Chargers’ backfield pecking order, but this will remain a fluid situation moving forward. Kelley out-snapped Jackson 38-to-31 and handled 17 touches to Jackson’s 10 against the Jaguars. The matchup this week is much tougher against a Denver defense that allows the 3rd-fewest RB points per game. The Broncos have allowed just 2 backs to reach 10+ fantasy points in their last 4 games, and James White had to catch 8 passes to accomplish the feat. Given that the work will be split between Kelley and Jackson, I’d only be considering Kelley if you’re desperate here. There is some upside if he further takes over the early-down work and widens the playing time gap with Jackson, but it could just as easily go the other direction as well.
WR Tee Higgins, CIN (Wk. 8: vs. Ten.): I would lean towards playing Higgins if I have him, but the re-emergence of AJ Green has made him a bit more of a volatile play. Higgins saved his day with a 4th-quarter touchdown last week, but the 5 targets he saw come his way were the fewest he’s seen since week 1. Tennessee has been carved up by opposing wide receivers, allowing the 4th-most points per game to the position, but it’s Tyler Boyd who will have the easiest matchup in this one again slot corner Chris Jackson. Jackson is a 7th-round rookie who has been forced into a starting role and has a 29.9 coverage grade (scale from 0-100) from Pro Football Focus. Higgins still has easy starter upside in a game that could be a shootout, but there is some downside if he doesn’t get in the end zone.
WR Henry Ruggs, LV (Wk. 8:@CLE): If there was ever a week where Ruggs is going to look like a good option, it’s this one. He faces a Cleveland defense that has surrendered the 2nd-most WR points per game and ranks 25th in pass defense DVOA. The only thing holding him back is his lack of volume. Ruggs hasn’t seen more than 3 targets come his way in a game since week 1, but he didn’t let that stop him from going for 118 yards and a score against the Chiefs two weeks ago. At some point the Raiders have to give their number 1 receiver more opportunities. He’s a boom-or-bust WR3 this week, and the matchup makes me a little more inclined to take a chance on this being a boom week. He’s a very interesting option for DFS tournaments at $4,900 on DraftKings.
WR Marquez Callaway, NO (Wk. 8:@CHI): If you’re considering Callaway, you’ll need to monitor the status of Michael Thomas ahead of this game. If Thomas plays, Callaway would move to the ‘Rookies to Sit’ portion of the column. If Thomas is out, Callaway becomes an intriguing PPR WR3 option with Emmanuel Sanders also still sidelined battling a symptomatic case of Covid-19. Thomas did return to practice on Thursday, but his status is still up in the air. Callaway has played more than 65% of the offensive snaps in each of the last two weeks, and in those games he has averaged 8 targets, 6 catches, and 54.5 yards. The Bears are a stingy defense against WRs, allowing the 4th-fewest points per game to the position, but Drew Brees has a way of finding his guys. I think he would finish not too far off what he did last week if Thomas is out again.
WR Jerry Jeudy, DEN (Wk. 8: vs. LAC): When Courtland Sutton went down for the year, it was assumed it would be Jeudy who would step into a WR1 role for the Broncos, but that hasn’t been the case so far. Tim Patrick has cemented himself into that role instead with Jeudy serving as more of a secondary option. The rookie has just 13 targets over the last 3 games, and has turned them into 6 catches for 113 yards and a TD. This week’s opponent, the Chargers, allow the 10th-fewest WR points per game. With Jeudy spending a lot of time in the slot, he should at least avoid the toughest Charger CB Casey Heyward. It’ll be Patrick who draws that matchup, but this game won’t be a picnic for Jeudy. He should still see a handful of targets, but he’s not an option you should be relying on unless forced to in a deeper league.
WR CeeDee Lamb, DAL (Wk. 8:@PHI): Week 7 was a sobering reminder of just how low Lamb’s floor will be without Dak Prescott under center. This isn’t going to be the dynamic passing game it was early in the season, and Lamb will need volume to return productive games. Lamb gets the best matchup of the Dallas WRs, facing off with slot corner Cre’Von LeBlanc while Amari Cooper is likely to be shadowed by Darius Slay, but with Ben DiNucci under center you should be dropping expectations pretty low. Philly gives up the 12th-most WR points per game, but Lamb is no more than a floor PPR flex play this week.
TE Harrison Bryant, CLE (Wk. 8:@LV): Bryant made the most of Austin Hooper’s appendectomy last weekend by getting into the end zone twice against the Bengals. He played 77% of the offensive snaps and looks like the #1 tight end as long as Hooper is out. The Raiders haven’t been especially giving to tight ends, allowing the 14th-fewest TE points per game, but in the last 2 games they’ve allowed Travis Kelce to put up 8-108-1 and Gronk to put up 5-62-1. They also are pretty bad as a pass defense in general, ranking 29th in pass defense DVOA. Bryant should be an enticing TE streaming option as the lead TE in an offense that likes to utilize the position and has an implied total of more than 28 points this week. Another top-10 TE finish wouldn’t be a surprise.
Rookies to Sit:QB Tua Tagovailoa, MIA (Wk. 8: vs. LAR): Tua will make his first career start on Sunday, and it comes in a less than ideal matchup. The Rams have allowed the 6th-fewest QB points per game, and any defense that boasts Aaron Donald and Jalen Ramsey isn’t a great one to make your first start against. There is some upside here. The Rams have allowed Jimmy Garoppolo and Josh Allen to each throw for 3+ TDs and 250+ yards against them, and Tua is in the same realm talent-wise as Burrow and Herbert. There are easier matchups coming for Tua. I’d leave him sidelined this week unless you’re desperate in a 2-QB or Superflex league.
QB Ben DiNucci, DAL (Wk. 8:@PHI): I’d avoid DiNucci unless he is the only available option for you. He had a sterling senior season at James Madison in 2019, but he was mediocre at Pitt before that. The NFL is a huge jump in competition level, and we’ve seen over the last couple weeks that the Dallas o-line is a mess right now. There are a couple positives for the rookie. He does have an arsenal of weapons at his disposal, he has the wheels to escape the inevitable heat he’ll feel in the pocket (he averaged over 500 yards rushing per season in 2 years at JMU), and Philly isn’t a fearsome QB defense. Philly has allowed the 16th-most QB points per game despite facing the 2nd-easiest QB schedule in the league so far. Despite all that, I expect DiNucci to look like a deer in the headlights at times and wouldn’t trust him in any fantasy formats this week. If Dallas had any way to avoid playing him, they would take it.
RB La’Mical Perine, NYJ (Wk. 8:@KC): Perine has been playing as the lead back for the Jets for a couple weeks now, out-snapping Frank Gore 81-to-41, but Gore is getting more of the opportunities. Gore has 22 carries and 4 targets in those games, and Perine has 18 carries and 6 targets. The Chiefs are as heavy a favorite as you’ll ever see in an NFL game, so the Jets may have to abandon the run fairly early on. There is a chance that Perine gets some receiving work in garbage time, but with the Jets implied total of 14.5, this is an offense to avoid for the most part (especially the running backs). You could roll Perine out there if you’re desperate, but you’ll be better off looking for a higher upside option.
RB DeeJay Dallas, SEA (Wk. 8: vs. SF): Dallas may be forced into a prominent role this week with Chris Carson likely out and Travis Homer banged up as well. If both sit this week, Carlos Hyde will serve as the early down back and Dallas will work as the third-down guy and receiving back. This isn’t the best matchup to roll out a guy who will serve mainly as a receiving back. The 49ers haven’t allowed any running back this year to get to 4 receptions, and only two backs have reached 20 receiving yards against them. Dallas played 12 snaps last week and handled zero rushing attempts. That won’t lead him to a productive fantasy game this week.
RB Cam Akers, LAR (Wk. 8:@MIA): Until we see Akers start to play more, there’s no way to justify putting him in your lineup. He’s been on the field for just 4 snaps in the last two weeks. Akers would need an injury ahead of him or a blowout on the scoreboard to get into the game. The Dolphins do rank dead last in run defense DVOA, but they excel in pass defense and should at a minimum stay in the game.
RB AJ Dillon, GB (Wk. 8: vs. Min.): Aaron Jones probably returns this week, but even if he doesn’t Dillon touched the ball just 5 times last week with Jones out. Jamaal Williams worked as the clear lead back. It does seem silly that the Packers used a second-round pick on Dillon but are so unwilling to put him on the field. Minnesota is a middle-of-the-pack run defense, but even if this were a great matchup Dillon doesn’t play enough to be trusted.
WR Chase Claypool, PIT (Wk. 8:@BAL): What a change a couple weeks have made for Claypool. Two weeks ago he was the talk of the league after a 4-touchdown breakout game. Last Sunday he saw just one target and finished the day with negative yards. He’s bound to be better than that this week. The Steelers won’t hold anything back against the Ravens, and Claypool has been one of the best playmakers on the team. I’m sure there will be a few shot plays drawn up for the rookie, but with Diontae Johnson back on the field Claypool basically functions as a part-time WR3. In his 3 healthy games, Johnson has averaged nearly 13 targets per game (31% target share). In those 3 games, Claypool has averaged 2 targets. You should steer clear unless you’re desperate this week. Diontae did get a little banged up at the end of the Titans’ game. It sounds like he should be fine, but if he is unexpectedly out Claypool becomes a high upside WR3.
WR Donovan Peoples-Jones, CLE (Wk. 8: vs. LV): Peoples-Jones made a spectacular game-winning TD catch last Sunday after Odell Beckham exited with what turned out to be a torn ACL. It was an exciting moment for the rookie, and may be the first truly big catch he’s made since high school or earlier. He’s always had tantalizing potential but was never a consistent performer at Michigan. Some people expect DPJ to assume a bigger role in the offense with Beckham out, but I would pump the brakes at least a little bit. Rashard Higgins is the guy who becomes an immediate starter, and Cleveland uses their 2-tight end set as a base formation. There will be more playing time for DPJ, but that will probably mean he’ll be playing 40-50% of the offensive snaps going forward. Vegas is a burnable pass defense, ranking 29th in pass defense DVOA, but if I’m taking a shot on a Browns wide receiver this week Peoples-Jones is third in line behind Jarvis Landry and Higgins. Jones should be rostered in deeper leagues in case he does emerge though.
WR Gabriel Davis, BUF (Wk. 8: vs. NE): Davis was a full-time player in week 7 with John Brown out, playing 95% of the offensive snaps, but it didn’t translate into fantasy production. He posted just 1 catch for 11 yards on 3 targets. Brown is practicing in full this week as of Wednesday, and it’s hard to envision Davis being a better play when he goes back to playing less than 50% of the snaps against a talented New England secondary.
WR Devin Duvernay, BAL (Wk. 8: vs. Pit.): Duvernay’s snap share increased for 4 consecutive weeks heading into the team’s bye, but some of that can be attributed to Miles Boykin being banged up. Boykin should be back to full strength after a week off. Duvernay has averaged 7 PPR points per game in the last two games, but Pittsburgh ranks 8th in pass defense DVOA and isn’t really a matchup to target for Duvernay.
Rookies on Byes in Week 8: RB James Robinson, JAX, RB Antonio Gibson, WAS, WR Laviska Shenault, JAX, WR Antonio Gandy-Golden, WAS
Deep League Sleepers, Stashes, and Cheap DFS Options:RB Ke’Shawn Vaughn, TB (Wk. 8:@NYG): Tampa enters week 8 as a 10.5-point favorite, and for now it seems that Vaughn has moved into the RB3 spot on the depth chart behind Ronald Jones and Leonard Fournette. If this game stays close, Vaughn won’t play much. He didn’t play much in a blowout win a week ago against the Raiders, but Tampa led by just 4 with 8 minutes to go and pulled away down the stretch. If they get up earlier in this one, I’d expect Vaughn to get some extended run. The Giants allow the 10th-most RB points per game. Vaughn is worth a look as a minimum priced option for DFS limited slate tournaments.
RB Jason Huntley, PHI (Wk. 8: vs. Dal.): With Dallas looking at Ben DiNucci starting at QB, the rout could be on for Philly. Since it became clear that DiNucci would start, the line has moved almost a touchdown in Philly’s favor. The Eagles are now a 9-point favorite. That could mean a lot of opportunity in the second half for Huntley and Corey Clement. Huntley has the burners to break a long touchdown, and Dallas is tied for the most 20+ yard runs (9) and 40+ yard runs (3) allowed this season. He’s no more than a dart throw for a limited slate DFS tournament or the deepest of leagues, but the opportunity is there for a strong game out of Huntley.
WR Denzel Mims, NYJ (Wk. 8:@KC): Mims walked into a much bigger role in his first game than I expected, turning 7 targets into 4-42. He was barely used at all in the 2nd half of the game, but the entire Jets’ offense called it a day at halftime anyway. This week they have a VERY low projected total at just 14.5 points, and they should be throwing a ton in a very negative game script. Breshad Perriman looks like he’ll be out this week, and Jamison Crowder could be as well. Mims will be the de facto WR1 if both guys miss this game. The Chiefs are a tough WR matchup, allowing the 5th-fewest points per game to the position, but the ball has to go somewhere. Mims costs little more than the minimum on DraftKings, and you could make a case for starting him if you need a fill-in in a deep league. It’s easy to envision him topping the production he put up in his debut, but I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting for a TD in this one.
WR Tyler Johnson, TB (Wk. 8:@NYG): Tyler Johnson has had a nice stretch over the past 3 weeks, with 60 yards or a touchdown in each game, and he gets a fortuitous opportunity this week. Antonio Brown will be ready to go for week 9, so this may be the last chance he gets as a rookie to make his mark, and Chris Godwin will miss Sunday’s game with a broken finger. The last time Godwin missed a game, Johnson played 79% of the snaps and finished with 4 catches for 61 yards on 6 targets. The Giants have allowed the 11th-most WR points per game and rank 27th in pass defense DVOA. Mike Evans and Rob Gronkowski are certainly ahead of Johnson in the target pecking order this week, but Johnson might legitimately be #3. He’s a fill-in option in really deep leagues, and in-play for DFS tournaments at just $3,500 on DraftKings.
WR KJ Hamler, DEN (Wk. 8: vs. LAC): While Tim Patrick and Jerry Jeudy are dealing with Casey Heyward and Desmond King respectively, Hamler will get to face off with Michael Davis. Davis has allowed the highest QB rating against, and the most yards per target into his coverage of any of the Chargers starting corners. In the 3 games he’s played, Hamler has averaged 5 targets and 1 rushing attempt, and could see a couple extra opportunities come his way with the tougher individual matchups for Patrick and Jeudy. KJ has enough speed to break a long TD, and he may be worth a DFS dart throw at just $3,600 on DraftKings.
WR Jalen Reagor, PHI (Wk. 8: vs. Dal.): Reagor is back at practice this week and seems likely to be activated for week 8’s matchup with the Cowboys. I don’t think this is an ideal week to get him into your fantasy lineups, but if he’s available on the wire in a deeper league, he’s a guy you should target. The Eagles are light on offensive weapons right now outside of Travis Fulgham, and Reagor can be a game breaker. The matchup this week is a good one on paper, with Dallas allowing the 6th-most WR points per game, but this one could be over by halftime with Dallas starting an unheralded rookie QB. If you want to wager that Jalen makes an impact while the game is still competitive, the best place to do that would be in a DFS tournament. Reagor costs just $3,600 on DraftKings this week.
TE Albert Okwuegbunam, DEN (Wk. 8: vs. LAC): Okwuegbunam didn’t play a single snap in the first 4 games of the season, but he’s announced his presence in a big way over the last two weeks. He’s an athletic weapon who clearly still has good chemistry with his college QB Drew Lock. Albert has played just 52 snaps in the last two weeks, and had the ball come his way on 13 of them. Noah Fant returned from injury last week, and the rookie still saw 7 targets and caught every one of them for 60 yards. This is a guy who shouldn’t be on your dynasty waiver wire, and would make for an intriguing dart throw this week in DFS tournaments at just $2,800 on DraftKings. The Chargers allow the 12th-most TE points per game.
TE Cole Kmet, CHI (Wk. 8: vs. NO): Kmet has largely been an afterthought for fantasy players this season, serving as the Bears TE3 behind Jimmy Graham and Demetrius Harris. Kmet’s still not a guy you can trust in season-long lineups, but it appears he may have pulled even with Harris on the depth chart, playing more snaps than the veteran for the first time this season last Monday. In the first 4 games of the season, Kmet was targeted just 3 times and turned them into 1 catch for 12 yards. He finally broke through with a touchdown in week 6, but I chalked it up to a fluke. He followed that up with another 2 catches for 45 yards in week 7. I know those aren’t ‘startable’ fantasy numbers, but he is heading in the right direction and the Saints have allowed the 2nd-most TE points per game this year. New Orleans has given up 30+ yard catches to little-used tight ends Foster Moreau and Jesse James this season, and let Marcedes Lewis in the end zone as well. Kmet will cost the minimum on DraftKings, and if there was any week to take a chance on Kmet having a surprisingly good game, this is the one to do it. The possible absence of Allen Robinson would free up some targets, and a couple of those could find their way to Cole.
That’s all I’ve got for this week. Hopefully it helps you with your toughest lineup decisions involving rookies. Keep a close eye on the injury report throughout the week and make sure you don’t start anyone who ends up inactive. Feel free to hit me up on twitter if you have any questions or want to yell at me about anything written above (@Shawn_Foss). As always: Good luck, trust your gut, and have fun. It’s just a game. Original article from drinkfive.com.
In Which a Single Mom Totally Sells her Lifestyle.
Me, ScarlettTheRed. 24. Proudly childfree.
BigBro. My elder brother. 27 at the time. One of the greatest men to ever exist.
BabyBro. The awesomest 12 year old ever. Keeps old people like me up to date on what all the kids these days are doing.
SingleMom. Early 30s. Brood of boys. Hockey mom.
Lets begin the tale. I was about to get married, and had been receiving a lot of bullshit from my Breeder in laws. BabyBro’s Junior hockey team had made the semi finals. My fiancée had promised to help a friend move, so I was on my own for the day. BigBro and I went to watch BabyBro’s game (I know a lot of you wouldn’t want to give up a Saturday afternoon to watch a bunch of middle schoolers play hockey, but he was so excited and my parents were out of town and I wanted to support him and...)
Anyway, BabyBro was staying with me for the weekend. BigBro picked us up and we all headed to the arena. We wished BabyBro good luck, and he went off to warm up with his team. Then we sat in the bleachers with a bunch of parents.
We found a seat near Single Mom. She was sitting with a boy of around 8-ish playing a 3DS and another boy, maybe 5? He was wiggly and she kept telling him to sit down.
The game starts. The announcer calls out the players as they glide onto the ice. BigBro and I holler for BabyBro.
SingleMom: You guys look way too young to be the parents of a middle schooler. What’s your secret?
BigBro: Oh, we’re not parents. We’re brother and sister. We’re just here to support our little brother.
Me: Yeah, neither of us are really kid people. (I love BabyBro to death, but holy hell, nothing knocks all desire for kids out of you quite like having a younger sibling after a big age gap.)
SingleMom: That’s wise. I had my oldest at 21. If I could go back, I wouldn’t have had him so young. You only get your 20’s once, you know? Best to live your life and do what you want BEFORE settling down and having children.
BigBro was smart enough to keep his mouth shut. I was not.
Me: I actually don’t want kids ever. I did enough babysitting for my little cousins as a kid (read: I was roped into babysitting because faaaaaaamily) and I don’t think kids would really add to my life.
SingleMom: That’s what everybody says. My sister said the same thing, and now she’s a mom. You’ll probably change your mind too.
Me: Well, I got sterilized, so....(really should’ve kept my fucking trap shut.)
SingleMom: Oh, that’s a shame. What are you, 22?You’re so young. You don’t even know what you’ll want in your 30s. What’s better than having a family?
Me: (recovering from the whiplash) Peace and quiet and free time.
BigBro motions for me to leave it. We watch the game. BabyBro scores two goals. We holler.
A conversation begins somehow.
SingleMom: I don’t remember seeing you guys at any earlier games. Did your brother begin late in the season?
Me: Nah. We just go to a few of his games. My parents are out of town and this was important to him (it was the first time his team had made it to the semi finals since he’d been playing.)
SingleMom: (laughs) Must be nice to do whatever you want on the weekends.
Me: It’s the best.
SingleMom: Yeah, I was a team mom the past two seasons, but this year I’m the den mother for this one (claps 8-year-old’s shoulder as he’s engrossed in his 3DS.) It’s hard being a working single mom with kids who are in so many activities. Tomorrow we have church, then a Scouts meeting and a birthday party to go to.
Me: (not sure what to say without sounding like a cunt) Yeah, it sounds time consuming.
SingleMom’s kid scores a goal. She hollers. The 5 year old screams so loud, my brother and I flinch. The 8 year old is unresponsive.
SingleMom: Why don’t you put the 3DS down and watch your brother play?
8yearold: I want to keep playing Pokémon.
5yearold: Take it away from him! Take it away from him!
SingleMom: HUSH! 8yearold, give me that 3DS. You’ve spent too much time on it today already.
8yearold: Hockey is boring! I don’t want to!
SingleMom: 8yearold, give me the 3DS or you lose all your screen time privileges for the rest of this weekend AND next weekend.
8 year old grumbles, hands over the 3DS, and pouts.
The second quarter winds down. BabyBro’s team is ahead.
BigBro: I’m gonna get a hot cocoa before the lines get super long at halftime. You want one?
Me: Hell yes.
BigBro heads out for cocoa. He comes back with two cups. The buzzer buzzes for halftime.
8 year old: Can I have a hot cocoa?
SingleMom: Well, your brother’s team is going to X pizzeria after the game. Do you want a hot cocoa now or a sugary treat there?
8 year old: I want a hot cocoa.
SingleMom: All right, but if you want a treat there, I’m going to remind you that you had a hot cocoa here (side note: I hate it when people talk down to kids like this.)
SingleMom gets her brood in line for the refreshments. They come back with waters and hot drinks.
The third quarter begins. Something’s gotten into the five year old. He crawls over the bleachers, under the bleachers, stands up and screams in our ears. The mom snaps at him and snaps at him.
The other team scores a goal. He boos.
SingleMom: Stop that! That’s such bad sportsmanship!
I feel a tug on my blanket. I turn around and see the five year old.
SingleMom: Stop that! I’m so, so sorry.
Me: It’s whatever. I think we’re just gonna move. Come on, BigBro.
We move and watch the rest of the game. I can hear the screams from the other side of the bleachers. We hollered when BabyBro scored, but we hollered like MATURE ADULTS, dammit.
BabyBro’s team ends up losing. They’re not going to the finals. We meet up with him in the lobby. He looks quite glum.
BabyBro: I really thought we would make it.
BigBro: Hey, cheer up. You scored five of your team’s goals!
Me: Yeah, you’re the MVP to us! Tell you what, for doing so well in your game today, you can pick one of my buttons to keep (I have a nice button pin collection on my bag.) I only give these away to people who earn it.
BabyBro looks at the buttons on my purse.
BabyBro: That one (he picks out a button.)
BigBro takes the button and holds it up.
BigBro: For being a total badass on the ice, I present to you.....the highest award in all of youth hockey....the “I Am A Total Badass On The Ice” award.
He fastens the button on his jersey.
BabyBro: My team’s going to X pizzeria. I want to go.
Me: We heard. I LOVE X pizzeria. Let’s go!
BigBro: I’ll head out and warm up the car.
Me: Go ahead. I need to pee.
I pee. SingleMom flags me down in the lobby.
SingleMom: I’m so, so sorry for my son’s behavior during the game. He lost pizza privileges after you left.
Me: It’s seriously not a big deal. Thanks anyway, though.
SingleMom: Your brother is really handsome. Is he single?
Me: Yeah, but he doesn’t date moms.
SingleMom: Oh, but I just saw him with your little brother. He’s so good with kids!
Me: It’s really just BabyBro. He doesn’t really know what to do with kids he’s not related to.
SingleMom: I’ll bet he’ll change his mind when he meets the right woman.
Whatever. I’m not arguing.
We head to X pizzeria. It’s this awesome local pizza place in my town with a bar and some bomb af desserts. Fuck it. Cheat meal.
BabyBro sits with his team. Most of the families sit at a separate table and order drinks. BigBro and I get a separate table by the fireplace because we aren’t masochists. I start with a gin and tonic, and we order pizza.
It was quite delicious. I maaaaaaay have also ordered a couple glasses of wine. Hey, BigBro was driving and doesn’t drink, so we met the “at least one responsible adult” quota.
BigBro: Man, that was good. You want to order the lava cake? (This place has a gigantic lava cake big enough to share.)
Me: Count me in. I’ll get BabyBro.
I come up to BabyBro and tap him on the shoulder.
Me: Hey BabyBro, we’re gonna share the lava cake.
From the table behind us, I hear...
SingleMom: You had hot cocoa at the game! I told you, no dessert!
8yearold: HE gets lava cake even though he got a milkshake!
SingleMom: I said NO!
BabyBro and I head to the table. We order and then devour the lava cake. BabyBro is not my child and therefore his sugar consumption is not my problem.
Things start winding down. Families start heading home. BabyBro’s talking to one of his friends. SingleMom approaches us.
SingleMom: It was nice meeting you today, BigBro.
BigBro: Thanks! It was nice meeting you too.
SingleMom: I just wanted to know if you wanted to get a cup of coffee at some point?
BigBro: Thanks but no thanks. I don’t date single moms.
Me: Told you.
SingleMom: Oh, my boys are just being rowdy today. They’re usually really sweet.
BigBro: As I was saying, I don’t date single moms.
A shadow crosses SingleMom’s face.
SingleMom: Ugh, men are all the same. You see a woman with kids and you consider her “spent.” It’s not my fault my husband left me with three boys.
BigBro: I didn’t say you were spent! I said I don’t date single moms! People are allowed to have standards on who they date.
SingleMom: You don’t understand how hard it is. Every weekend I have to drive my kids all over town, and then come home and cook and clean and do yard work. Sometimes I just want a partner to bring a little stability to the family. I’ve been rejected by so many guys just because I’m a mom! You don’t know what you’re missing.
At this point, I have a few drinks in me and let it loose.
Me: Look. You made your decision to be a mother. That is fine. We made our decision to not have children and not spend our weekends ferrying our children to multiple different activities. My brother’s allowed to want a woman who is compatible with that lifestyle. You don’t get to demand men date you if you don’t have what they want.
(I know. I’m the greatest sister in the world.)
SingleMom stares at me.
SingleMom: One day when you have children, you’ll be in my position.
Me: What part of “I’m sterile” do you not get? I did it specifically SO I won’t have children.
SingleMom: BOYS! We’re leaving.
She stomps out with her brood in tow. We pay the bill and call BabyBro to get in the car.
Me: You SURE you don’t know what you’re missing, BigBro?
BigBro: I think her youngest gave me permanent ear damage. I’m good.
Me: You could change your mind! I see in your future a woman with twelve daughters.
BigBro: GOD, no.
Me: It’s your duty to bring stability to a family!
BigBro drops me and BabyBro back at my place. BabyBro and I spent the rest of the weekend doing whatever the fuck we wanted.
TL;DR Men, it’s your duty to date single moms.